What to do?

Well, I knew our run off good luck would run out. I have been worried all summer about which teachers the kids would get. Our school has gone through major upheaval with teachers being laid off, then the schools being divided with a new one opening, then the teachers being rehired--but there was no room at our school for them, so the ones who were laid off (the young, energetic, exciting ones) all went to the other school.

The other teachers all rearranged to different grades, and now I am so sad. They both got the ONE teacher from their grade that I didn't want them to have. I feel like they are both being punished for being good kids. N. is easygoing and a peacemaker. He always ends up being sat next to the troublemaker kid to be a "good influence" or when their is an uncomfortable situation that they don't know what to do with--they put him there because he adapts so well. So--he got screwed. I don't know how to help him. His best friend (and only friend that didn't move to the other school) is in a different class. Maybe if they had been in class together, it would have been fine, but he's alone and miserable. He's in his room now, just being dejected. It isn't his style to pout or fuss or cry, but he is SO down. . .

I don't know about R's situation. I'm trying to believe that I am only disappointed because it wasn't the teacher I wanted, and that I should just quit thinking things should always go my way and not worry about it. Mostly I am upset because all of the other kids from his preschool class except one are in the other classroom. I think I feel like he has been shunned or rejected somehow. Almost like all the other kids parents specifically requested that he NOT be in the class with their kids. I assume that isn't true, since they all say they love him, but I can't help but be sad.

I talked to the principal, but you could tell that she had rehearsed all summer and was very prepared to flat out turn down any request for changes. It kind of pisses me off, after everything I did at Vacation Bible School for 425 kids, it seems like she could do it for the kids at school. But, I guess that's not a fair way to look at it. I don't know what to do. I can't even pretend to be excited and find a way to "spin" it for them. Every time I look at either of them I start to cry, and I had to make up something about it being because of a story I heard that was sad.

I love being involved at the school, and I love volunteering in the classroom, but I am having a hard time picturing myself doing that this year. I don't know how I can change my attitude. I am praying that they will surprise me, and that I will have just upset myself for no reason. But right now, I just can't shake this feeling that I've been punched in the gut--twice.

Originally we were supposed to move this summer. I'm starting to REALLY wish that had happened.

PS--on a side note, I'm a walking example of what Weight Watchers calls "emotional eating" right now. All I can think of is saying to the kids "Let's go to Cold Stone and get ice cream!" I suck in SO VERY MANY WAYS.