Still Alive!

As I'm sure most of you would agree--this is a busy time. Things have gotten better (as far as what I was distraught over in the last post) but I just haven't had time to write that yet! There were so many things that happened since Halloween that I wanted to share, but just got "overcome by events". . .

Here is a quick update--
We took my mom to Disneyland for the first time in her life in October. It was one of the coolest things ever. I remembered that when I was in high school, she told me a story about having watched the weekly Disney show as a little girl. She was mesmerized by Walt Disney's voice, and NOTHING could distract her as the show went on. She said it would always make her happy, because she KNEW that all kids got to go to Disneyland. She was happy because she knew she was going to go.

I asked if she ever went. No. I was upset by that--I still remember, even though high school was longer ago than I'd like to admit. I said "That's not a happy story. Why were you happy? That's a SAD story!" I was very angry with her parents. Now, keep in mind that I had never been to Disneyland either--but it wasn't my dream, so no harm done!

Fast forward 20 years. . .we have Disneyland passes. I thought it would be "cute" to take her and tell her I remembered the story from high school. I just thought it was funny that I remembered her telling me that. And, I thought she'd have fun seeing the kids at Disney. (I should have remembered my first day there--it is WAY cooler than just watching the kids!)

So, the night before we were to go, the kids brough Oma her Mickey ears with her name stitched in it (we picked them up last time we were there). She said "Oh--that's cute!" The boys told her that's where we're going tomorrow. GET THIS! She CRIED! Truly! She was so excited and overwhelmed that SHE CRIED. Hmmmm . . .maybe more meaningful than just a funny memory!

The next day she sat in the back of the van like an excited kid. Didn't stop smiling the whole drive up. When we got there, we had to go through the security point, and then you go through the gate, and you have to go around the circle before you get to "Main Street." At about the ticket booths, she started saying "Where's the castle? I want to see the castle." I told her she couldn't miss it, we just had to go around the corner. I was wrong--there were two corners. We went around the first one, and I thought she was going to come out of her skin. . ."Are we going to see the castle???" Hilarious!

She had such a good time. She road roller coasters and bought tons of souvenirs and ate junk! At about 3pm, the little boys were getting tired, so S took N and his friend to ride some "big rides" and mom and I took the little ones in the stroller. They both fell asleep, so I sat on an out of the way bench with the boys, and my mom shopped a little more. About that time, the "Parade of Dreams" started. She grabbed the disposable camera and RAN to the parade street. Since she was by herself, she found a good spot and took pictures of EVERY SINGLE character! She used up the film and came back for the other camera and had tears running down her face. . .she was hysterical: "Donald Duck looked RIGHT AT ME for the picture! I was yelling at Snow White and she came over to me!" Then she said "This is like being 6 again! It's better than being six--six year olds have no idea how great this is!"

The rest of the day was a great as the first part and I was so happy that we did that. I had no idea it would be that cool. My mom thinks Disney should market that concept--"baby boomers getting to live the dream they had as a kid!"

Well, I guess that wasn't exactly an overview, but it was a cool story!

What else? We went back to Disney for Thanksgiving. We've never spent the night before, we just drive up for the day, so this was amazing. We were there for 5 days. I realized that we had not really ever been on a family vacation. We have traveled a LOT and done a lot of sightseeing and visiting family, but just a trip to relax and have fun? This was the first! By the afternoon of the second day, I had completely settled in to it. I felt what you are supposed to feel on vacation--relaxed! It was as though the definition of my life had become: ride rides, eat snacks, watch shows, ride more rides! So fun. The kids were great, no fighting, no begging for junk. They were wonderful.

I did go shopping the day after Thanksgiving. I am kind of intense about that. I do ALL of my Christmas shopping on that day--usually before 10am. I was still at Disney, of course, so I got up at 3:30, picked L up at her hotel, and we shopped in Anaheim. I had mapped the stores and planned where to buy what--so it went well. I was disappointed in Kohls because the cashiers were so slow. (The ones in Fresno last year were at least twice as fast!!) And, I was disappointed in Target, because they didn't really have any special sales. Walmart came through though--I was THRILLED with the deal I got there, and I only bought one thing!

The next week THE BAD STUFF happened. As you might have guessed, it had to do with S's work, and what was going to happen with all of us. It has been fixed now, and I'll talk more about that in a bit.

Craziness for a couple of weeks. . .holiday parties at school, I was in charge of the adopt a family program at school (the most wonderful, rewarding job ever--I can't wait to do it next year!), and then my brother and his family came out for an early Christmas.

We actually met them at Disney and stayed a few days. (The kids have completely forgotten at this point that you can go there for the day!!) It was so fun! I love to be with them, and their kids are just so cute. Our boys instantly (truly--in 5 seconds) were completely wrapped around their little cousins' fingers. Baby Bear had been REALLY sick for a couple of weeks, so he wasn't thrilled about outside adults being around, but he loved the boys (too many nurses and doctors poking and prodding made him a little wary of us--understandable !!) It was AWFUL to leave them. We all know that I don't do goodbyes well, and every time I say goodbye to my brother I feel like we are 15 and 13 again. . .that was not a good memory for me. . .anyway--it is hard to say goodbye. And little G. . .wow--it is terrible to say goodbye to her. I just wanted to not leave. Ever. I really think that someday we will have to live near each other. I love seeing our kids be close and loving each other!

And then came Christmas. . .the stuff with work got fixed about a week before, so we had a good holiday! I suppose it is weird to hear someone be HAPPY that their husband was leaving soon to be gone for a year and a half--but that's where I am now! S will leave in a few weeks and go to a few months of training, and then he'll go over for a year deployment. The kids and I will stay here, which makes them happy. I considered moving home, but I think that would be selfish. If I stay here, only one thing changes for the boys. They will miss Daddy, but they will adjust to that. If I move them, EVERYTHING changes, and those other things might be harder to adjust to--new house, new city, new friends, new school--that's just too much. So, we'll stay here. The only sticking point is to get the landlords to give us a longer lease, because I don't want to be stuck moving while he is gone! Cross your fingers!

As far as what went wrong--basically, when someone else is in control of your destiny, and they don't seem to care about the long term negative effects on your career, that is a hard place to be. When it is also going to have drastically negative effects on your family--that's just unbearable. But, it has been taken care of. I don't necessarily believe in Karma, but I do think that if you are being a good person, and doing your best to help other people, things will work out for you. That is kind of what happened for us. S spends a LOT of time helping people at work--getting soldiers to duty stations near sick relatives, helping them stay put for a kid to graduate, finding some random obscure piece of equipment and having shipped to a unit overseas, etc. I think he is being rewarded for all that work by this situation being resolved in a more positive result for us.

While it always sucks to have your husband gone, other than that, this is a good situation. We are in a great neighborhood in a beautiful city, in a house we love. S will do a job that he hasn't done before (he always loves that) and it will be good as far as his career goes--he's excited to get "home" to the Army, and he is really excited to do something different and see a new aspect of the "big picture." We will move in summer 2010, which is great, since we don't have to change in the middle of the school year (twice--that was part of the plan that was being forced before). So, Dad will be gone for a while, but we'll be fine. My "planner" brain is in engaged, and I have enough experience to have already started thinking ahead and preparing the kids. And, of course, to think of WHAT TRIP SHOULD WE GO ON FOR R&R? That's where I steer the conversation when the kids start talking about the deployment! We'll spend the whole first part planning that trip!

Christmas. . .
My mom came, and it was great. We picked her up and went straight to the bowl game! Truly--threw her in the car and sped to the stadium. Our nail biter game went in our favor and I have never screamed for 4 hours straight like I did that night! It was BEAUTIFUL!!

Christmas eve was spent shopping a little, and following our new tradition of eating KFC before opening presents. (I love this tradition!) We were at the C family's house and had a great relaxing evening. Opening presents, eating chicken, and laughing at the people on the news who were actually shocked that they were stranded in the Chicago airport do to delays (REALLY??? Have you not paid attention for the last, oh 300 years? It snows there. All flights go through there--you will never be on time. Visit your family in July!!)

The kids got WAY too much stuff for Christmas. Really. It is ridiculous. But, they don't get anything new all year. We really only get them one small thing at their birthdays, and we don't buy ANYTHING all year--toys, I mean. We do buy some clothes and food. So, that's why Christmas ends up being huge. But, they got all stuff they REALLY wanted, and they are overwhelmed. It is Dec 30th, and they are still frantically playing with everything, bouncing back and forth to try to get to all of it at once.

I also got a ton of stuff. A jade ring and earrings. Lots of cool clothes, and TOWELS!! We still had the same ones from when we first got married. 12 year old towels are not soft. S. got two books (we had agreed not to get each other anything because we bough cookware not long ago. I got him little token things--two great books. He got me a lot.) He got an awesome coffeepot from Oma, and Nana and Pop gave us a video camera. So, we are as excited as the kids!

Christmas dinner was at our house. My mom and S cooked--I didn't help. I grated the parmesan cheese, but that's it. I suck at cooking, but they were a great team and had a good time. The lasagna was FANTASTIC!! And, pecan pie for dessert. Yum! (You may remember my thing about never cooking a turkey--that's why we do Italian on Christmas. It's truly wonderful!) I picked up and put away gifts, and never seemed to find the bottom of the piles!

That evening we went to see Bedtime Stories (very cute!) and the next day--back to Disney for the last day of our passes (I never thought I would be so affected, but man was I SAD!!!) My mom left on the 27th, and now we are trying to get the house back in order, clean it, and get ready for a trip to see the T family in Vegas.

That about wraps it up for us. I will get some photos on soon (that is a relative term) and show some of the excitement I've been writing about! Thanks for checking in on me!

Goodbye...for a while, I guess

I know you are probably wondering why I haven't written in a long time. Part of the reason is just that life is so fast. I hardly have time to take the photos, much less post them and write about them.

But, for now, I just don't have anything nice to say. We had a wonderful wonderful trip over Thanksgiving. It was truly the greatest vacation we've ever had--I have the whole post written in my head. And yet, I am sad and depressed now, and that zaps my energy, so I can't get myself to sit and write it.

So, for now, I can't forsee me writing anything for a while. We'll see...

Famous!

Several of the kids pictures have been bought from the stock site, but we don't usually know how they are used. But, this time the designer sent us some photos! Here is J's billboard in Baton Rouge!! He's the pirate in the front!

My New Job Title

I have decided to rename my job "Ultimate Cheerleading." Remember when everything was "Ultimate Whatever?" Well, I bringing it back.

I may never be the mother of a cheerleader (then again, I guess I might. . .) anyway--I am STILL a cheerleader. I kind of always thought I would have a daughter and I would have so much fun as she did stuff I used to do, showing her pictures so she could laugh at my cheerleading uniform, sorority party dresses, etc. But, I have boys. So, instead of reaising a cheerleader--I am continuing to be one. Which, as it turns out, is quite fun.

Maybe that is why I always loved cheering instead of playing the sport. . .I was in training for my grown up life! You should see me today. It is soccer day. I am wearing a pink tshirt that says "I love the coach." The "love" is actually a red heart. Then, attached to shirt are 3, count 'em--3, buttons!! All photos of each of the children holding soccer balls. Hilarious! I will try to get someone to take a picture at one of the games today so I can post it.

Anyway--here is a video that I think describes the life I live today. You've probably seen it, but I can watch it over and over and it is still funny!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxT5NwQUtVM

Clarification

Ok, I am catching a lot of hell for not having any traditions in my family. So, in an effort to prevent my children from being kidnapped by the childhood memories police, I decided I need to clarify a little bit.

We do have traditions in our family. The ones I refuse to create are the ones that end up instilling a more guilt than they do pleasure. The ones that are tied to a specific day (instead of a spirit) and require everyone’s participation exactly right or else they are ruined completely. Just since I wrote that post I learned that not everyone has experienced this. I thought it was a universal thing, but I guess not, so I will explain.

My family had “traditions” when I was a kid. However, our life did not really support those traditions. For example, it was tradition to go to Galveston Island in the summer for a week. Problem was, that according to the custody agreement, my brother and I were to go to the other parent’s house during that time. So a lot of drama ensued. I won’t detail it here, but believe me when I tell you that first of all, kids understand a lot of things that adults think are over their heads. I knew EVERYTHING that was going on, no matter what flimsy excuse was created. Second, how is a 6 year old supposed to process that? Go to the beach or go visit my parent? What kind of stress is that to put on a child? It isn’t even cool to ASK!

Another example—my grandmother has a Christmas party every Christmas Eve. She lives in East Texas. That party is one of my earliest memories. My baby brother was born on December 23rd when I was 2 ½ years old. My grandparents came and got me to go stay with them and I remember the party that year. I remember the dress I was wearing and I remembering wondering what kind of dress the baby would be wearing if he was there (I didn’t realize yet that boy babies didn’t wear dresses). Anyway—I have lots of memories of that party.

But, through the years, I didn’t get to go. Whether it was due to someone being sick, or someone being mad, or someone getting divorced—I missed a lot of those parties. So, that made me sad. Then, when I was old enough to go alone, the guilt entered. My parents would have plans for Christmas Eve, and they would be angry that I was going to East Texas instead of staying with them. It wasn’t MY fault that tradition had been created for me—it was theirs. But, they had changed their minds, so I was supposed to also. Not fair.

Apparently, other families don’t have this issue. Maybe I just have a highly developed sense of guilt. But, I learned early. I guess some people don’t experience that until they go to college and decide not to go home for Thanksgiving. Or even when they get their first job and can’t take the time off or afford the plane ticket home. At least then you are an adult who has life skills and coping mechanisms to handle it. I was 4 years old when I first started feeling that stuff—not a lot of strength of spirit in a 4 year old.

Another reason I don’t want to establish those types of traditions (still guilt related) is that I have 3 boys. Someday, they will all get married. The likelihood is that they will be with their wives on holidays and special occasions. They MIGHT not, and that would be a great bonus—but I am NOT going to set myself up to be disappointed, and I am not going to set them up to live that GUILT!!!!! I am already planning it. There are several possibilities.

My first choice is that one of them marries RMcC. Then we would all be happy because I would just invite me and S right on over to their place for the holidays too! Or, vice versa. It would be ideal. Other options are that they could possibly marry someone who isn’t close to their family or something like that. But, IF they are typical, the wife will want to be near her family. That’s fine with me now, because it is so far in the future—so I am training myself for it to be fine later. My plan is for S and I to make the Christmas holidays our vacation time. We’ll celebrate with the kids when they are available—and it will be GREAT. There is no reason that the Christmas spirit has to be contained in 2 days. It just isn’t logical. If we have Christmas with one of our kids on October 18th, I will still be just as thrilled.

One thing that the Army has gifted to me is the ability to opt out of that guilt sometimes. Although I always THINK I am going to miss home at Christmas or whatever, I generally just feel overwhelming relief that I am not trying to visit 4 houses in 48 hours and still create some kind of merriment for my kids.

Deployments, overseas duty stations, even lack of money for airline tickets has taught me to appreciate the joy of being together—no matter when it is.

So, just to alleviate some of the disappointment some of you apparently have in me for my lack of traditions—here are some we have. Notice that none of them are things that will deal anyone a crushing blow and send them into therapy if they miss them. However, they do bring tremendous fun and joy to my family when we “celebrate” them. THAT is actually supposed to be the true point of traditions, right?

* (a relatively new one) We have KFC for dinner on Christmas Eve.
* We eat in the mess hall on Thanksgiving. (My goal is to never cook a turkey!) If you have never eaten at the mess hall for a holiday, you should try it. The cooks are fantastic and you don’t have to clean. Plus, you share the holiday meal with WAY more friends than could ever fit in one house. (This one is on hold for a few years, because in the navy officers aren’t allowed to eat in the mess hall. Weird, huh?)
* Santa leaves all the gifts out unwrapped and displayed and your stocking tells you where your gifts are. It is a magical feeling when you come in the room—like your own private toy store. . .a good overwhelming!
* Our kids wake up in their own house on Christmas morning. Sometimes, when we've moved at Christmas, we've been "homeless" and had to be somewhere else. The visit is nice, but I want them to have the memory of their own beds on Christmas morning.
* We eat lunch at Chik Fila on Saturdays
* We decorate for Christmas the day after Thanksgiving and we take it down the day after Christmas. We make cookies both days.
* Each of the kids gets a Tshirt everywhere we travel. We also get a coffeetable book and a small “trinket” that goes in a display cabinet to represent that place.
* At the end of the prayer before dinner, we go around the table and each of us thanks God for something from that day. (every dinner, not just Thanksgiving day)
* We make our family’s “special” cookies, invented by the oldest child. Brownie bites attached to chocolate chip cookies.
* We each have a different sound that our noses make (not really—it is like our own pretend horn. Mine is honk, honk. S’s is ahhyewga. N’s is beep, beep. Etc.)
* In an effort to not embarrass the kids, I don’t want to say “I love you” in front of their friends. It doesn’t bother them yet, but it will eventually. So, we’ve worked out a “code language.” I say “Don’t get in too much trouble” and they know that means “I love you.” They say “I’ll try not to” and I know they are saying “I love you too.”
* We wave a sign language “T” at each other instead of blowing kisses.
* We watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition together every week.
* We have “my brothers are my only friend” days. This is actually a punishment for being mean to each other, but it has become a tradition.
* We go to In and Out Burger and a movie on Fathers Day.
* We listen to music very loud with the windows down in the car whenever we can.
* The boys play a game they created called “rock, paper, armpit.” (This is the true definition of a male dominated household)
* We go running together frequently. N rides his bike and S pushes the little two in the stroller. I try to keep up—we all have our parts to play. The little boys cheer—go mommy go!
* Many lessons are taught with “Because I want your wife to like me!” Like, “why do we have to rinse the toothpaste out of the sink?” “Why do I need to know how to sweep the kitchen?”
* I get each of the kids an ornament every Christmas with the year on it. I leave them in the package, and they each have a box. When they move out, they will have 18-20 ornaments to take with them. For now, they like looking through them every year and seeing what they have. They also like helping pick out one that represents them for that year.

So, there you have it. The Monkey House versions of traditions. There are more, I’m sure, but I can’t think under pressure! So, please don’t send the authorities to take my children because I don’t know how to make cornbread stuffing!

Blog Issues

Two blog questions. . .

One--does anyone know if I can download my whole blog to my hard drive? I keep thinking that if every blogspot just disappears, so does my blog. It has kind of become a diary for me and a very good excuse to not do scrapbooks, photo albums, baby books, etc. I need to keep it!

Two--is anyone else having trouble with blogspot? I read about 13 blogs. I check in on them every 3 or 4 days. For the last week or so, every time I start trying to go through them, the first two or three are fine, and after that they won't open. What's the deal?

Tagging

Hey--
I just looked at my list and realized that I intended to tag as many of the blogs that I read as I could. Somehow, I missed Roaming Florida Family. . .so if you read this--tag! You're it! Scroll down a couple of posts for the instructions!

Blinkie Things

Ok fellow bloggers--does anyone know how to design those little blinkie things? I have a few on my blog, but I just get them from other places. I want to make one. Somehow I don't think any of the blog decorator sites have one that says this: "You haven't even imagined HELL until you've looked in my eyes after you hurt my child!"

Can you guess how my week is going?

Interesting Story

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating fromNorth-western University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephan tstanding with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephant's foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again,wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

This is for all of my friends who send me those heart-warming bullshit stories.

I don't know why I think this is so funny. I LOVE those heart-warming bullshit stories! But, for some reason, this just cracked me up!!

Tagged

I was tagged by my friend--
Here are the rules:
1. Post the rules on your blog
2. List 6 random things about yourself
3. Tag 6 people at the end of your post

This may be harder than I thought, because most of my life is pretty random, so I'm not sure what to write! Also, I don't think I actually read 6 blogs, so I will just tag a couple that I read that haven't been tagged yet. Then we'll see how often they read my blog!

--I sleep with the toes of one foot hooked on the back of my other achilles tendon.

--I can make my eyeballs shake.

--My degree is in Radio/Television/Film, but I never took a radio or film class.

--My favorite part of Christmas is trying to think of the perfect gift for each person. Something that is really "them" even if they haven't asked for it.

--I refuse to create traditions that are connected to a particular day or holiday, because I don't want me or my kids to be disappointed if we can't do it. I'd rather teach them to appreciate the beauty of togetherness--whenever we can have it.

--Every place we have lived since we got married has had either "record breaking" weather or a natural disaster (or more than one) while we lived there. I warned my friends when we got here, and I told them to get their emergency kits ready. Everyone laughed. Until last October when the fires came.

Not very interesting. . .I know. I will probably think of better stuff later, after I've posted this. If I do, I'll change them in a different post.

Ok--tags. . .I was wrong. I read more than 6 blogs. I'm tagging everyone that hasn't already done it because I like to read the answers!!

KB
Itsy Bitsy Me
Watts Up
A Pink and A Blue
Chaotic Cranium
This That & Whatever
Erika
Lewis Logic
Random Ramblings
Funny Farm

Funny Words

I know you aren't supposed to "encourage" your kids when they say words wrong. We don't use baby talk with them, and all of our kids talk like they are teenagers. They've never had speech issues, which is why I think it is SO CUTE when they get a word wrong. I don't use their new versions, but I don't exactly correct them either. It happens so rarely anyway!

When N. was about 3 he asked for a tee tora to eat. I couldn't figure out what he meant, so he got one out of the refrigerator. It was a flour "tortilla!" I loved that. He also said cicle pop instead of popcicle.

I get stuff mixed up like that sometimes, usually words that have an "n" and an "m" in them. I usually say cimannon instead of cinnamon and I sometimes say aminal instead of animal. Maybe I feel a connection to the kids when they do it too!

Anyway--R hasn't ever really done that. I think there was something similar, but I didn't write it down. . .so out it went from my brain.

So, today, J. said his. He won an ice cream coupon at the Barn Dance on Friday. Today he asked me where his conpoo was. I couldn't figure it out until he went and got it. He mixed up the syllables. Cracks me up. I actually did try to tell him the right way to say it, but I didn't try very hard. It is so funny! He keeps asking when he gets to use the conpoo. I'm not sure how to answer that!

It's Too Hot

It is hot here. We have air conditioning, but I am so proud of having never turned it on, that I don't want to ruin my record (we actually tried to use it last year, but it was broken and by the time they fixed it, it was cooled off again.)

I'm sure that actual HOT places would not consider it hot here. It was in the high 90s today. But, right now, it is about 84 outside. It is about 75 inside, but the thermometer is downstairs, and it is much warmer up here. I think the boys and I are going to sleep downstairs (S. is TDY).

I wouldn't normally write about the weather, but it just seems weird to compare my weather with my friend E's. She is WAY up north, and has snow on the ground. That just seems strange to me!

Seasons are really not meaningful to me. I don't like cold--at all. I have always said I wanted to live somewhere that was 75 degrees year round and near the water. Incidentally, S always told me it would never happen because the Army doesn't have places like that! Ha! I knew this assignment was like winning the lottery!

Anyway--for the first time, I've noticed in myself a LITTLE bit of yearning for cooler weather. Not much cooler, just a little. My favorite clothing ensemble here is to wear jeans, a Tshirt and flip flops. That is basically a fall and spring wardrobe here. I love that. I have been wishing for that lately, but it is still too warm. I wore pants to run in yesterday and I felt like I was on fire.

Well, much like what always happens to me when S is out of town, I am rambling. . .going to sleep now!

New Background

I know this background is completely inappropriate for my family. I write about the kids mostly, and none of them would approve of the girly-ness of it. But, that is the reason for it. I never wore pink as a kid, and I'm not much of a girly-girl. Lately, though, I find myself more and more drawn to pink. Even things I wouldn't normally get in ANY color other than neutrals (like sunglasses). I think as the boyness grows and grows around here, I am trying to find ways to assert the fact that there actually IS some estrogen here!

Photos

Soccer Photos. . .

J. gets to play a little. . .he still has no idea he's not really on the team!



Who says soccer is a non-contact sport?

Barn Dance Cowboys!

Where Have We Been?

Well, we've been lots of places. I have been so busy since school started that I actually had a screwed up heartbeat last week. I noticed all day that my heart seemed to be beating extra hard, but I thought it was because the football game was such a crusher (that ref!! Good grief!!) Anyway--that night when I went to bed I noticed it again. I started counting and every third beat it would skip, and then it would beat extra hard the next time. . .to make up for it, I guess. I don't know. I couldn't go to sleep for about 4 hours, because I was so scared. (S. paid attention for a grand total of 3 minutes, and then fell asleep, so I worried alone.) Anyway--the next day I decided that I had to make one of my famous lists. I was so overwhelmed by the stuff I needed to do, that I was freaking out about it. I needed it written down by deadline date, because I kept thinking I was doing something that could wait, and something that needed to be done right away was getting skipped! It was making me freeze and not do anything!



So, this weekend is my first event as the PTA Family Nights Chair. I do not think it is going to go well. I have only presold about 73 tickets. I was hoping for about 300 people to attend, so I'm not excited. We'll see what happens. That has been consuming a lot of my time. Every time I think I am going to sit down and blog, I feel guilty because I should be doing SOMETHING to get ready for this silly thing! But, Friday at 8:30pm it will be over--good or bad, so that is nice.



I have also been having a sort of crisis with my house. I think it is because we have been here so long (2 1/2 years!!) and I am feeling like we are filling up our house with all kinds of useless JUNK. Usually we clear things out as we are packing out, or at least when we get to the next place as we are unpacking. Since we didn't leave this summer, that didn't happen, and I am tired of all the stuff. So, I am going room by room and putting my hands on EVERYTHING in this house. Opening every drawer, looking at every paper, etc. I have thrown away mountains of stuff, and have a huge amount of space in the garage filled with stuff to get rid of at a garage sale or as donations. I don't know when I am actually going to HAVE the garage sale. I don't want to set a date until I am finished with this purge, because then I will rush through to get stuff out of here, and I'll end up a few months later looking at things and saying "I should have gotten rid of that too!" And, we have soccer every weekend between now and Thanksgiving, so that will put the garage sale off for a while too.



We are going to spend our Thanksgiving week at Disney. We are all very excited. This is very much in keeping with my philosophies of NOT establishing traditions that are locked to a specific day or holiday and not ever cooking a turkey. I would much rather eat cotton candy and ride a roller coaster, and I think my kids would too.



The kids have been playing soccer for the last few weeks. The second week, N. got kicked in the side at warm up time. (Did I already write about this?) No--I just checked. I haven't. Anyway--he played the first half of the game, but was still holding his side (he made some AMAZING saves, by the way!) At halftime, he was still complaining. He started the second half as a forward, and about 3 minutes in, started asking for a sub. He NEVER asks to come out of the game, so I knew something was up. By the time he got to the sideline, he was crying and saying he couldn't breathe. I asked if he wanted to go to the doctor (always my trick to see the seriousness) and he said "Yes, and I want to go right now!"



That freaked me out, so I snatched him up and took off. I didn't have my purse, so I took S's military ID and off we went. It turned out that he had a bruised kidney, and he was quite interested to learn that there was blood in his urine. For some reason, that seemed completely bizarre to him. It took about a week to get over and then he was fine.



THEN--the next week, he fell out of a swing and broke his arm. Both bones. Fortunately, they were both fractures (one hairline and one "mushroom"). It didn't have to be set, but it is in a cast. He is out for 3 weeks. He is NOT happy about it. It happened last Thursday, so Saturday he was still in a lot of pain. Now he is not, and has already asked what our league's rule is about playing if you have a cast. Apparently, if you wrap it in bubble wrap it is ok, but I'm not sure how I feel about it. I am at least making him sit out one more week. We'll see about next week.



J. is doing a lot better at school. He doesn't cry anymore when I leave him. He likes his class, even though he doesn't really play with any of the other kids. I don't really see any of them play together, so I guess they are still in that "tandem play" stage. He sometimes says things like "They are mean to me" but I know that isn't true, so I think he is just thinking he doesn't want to go. But, once he's there, he is fine.



He has gotten bored with soccer, which is good. S was letting him play with R's team, but now we have 2 new kids, so there really isn't time for him to go on the field. Although, most of the team gets sick of the game WAY before it is over, so I guess J will be able to play if he wants to. He pays much better attention that several of the boys, and he is definitely big enough and coordinated enough to play with the 5 year olds. I've decided that for baseball, I will sign up to coach Tball, so I can have him on R's team. He just wants to be a part SO BAD, so if I can make that happen, I'm going to do it!



R. is playing fantastic. He is really aggressive and has scored several times in each game. That is really cool for him. He is also AMAZING in school. I am shocked. I really expected him to have trouble paying attention since he is so "easily distracted" at home. But, he is a model student. He sits perfectly still at carpet time and listens and participates. He sits at his table and does his work without ever ever getting in trouble. He has even gotten a citizenship award, and got a prize from the principal. When he gets home he is basically spinning in circles, but we are cutting him a lot of slack because he must have it all stored up inside from being so good at school!! It is very important to him to give me a whole rundown of the day's events, behavior wise. He tells me who lost their playtime, who earned it back, who got a citizenship award, who is friends, who is fighting, and who had to switch tables because they can't be quiet.



He still talks like he is 15. My friend Cathi was doing his class's "reading assessment." She showed him a book and said "R, this person's name is blah blah. Who do you think that person is?" He said "Well, it could be two people. It could be the author--which is the person who writes the words of the book. Or, it could be the illustrator, which is the person who draws the pictures of the book. Does this book have pictures?"



She then showed him the first page and said "R, what would you say if I asked you what this first page says?" (They don't want to say "Do you know what this says?" or "What does this say?" so they don't put the kids in a spot of having to feel like they've failed at something.) Anyway--he said "Well, I would say 'I don't know how to read yet, Miss Cathi!' " He is hilarious!



He loves to quote his teacher, Ms. D. Her word is basically gospel. He tells us the rhymes she says for learning to write letters and all the different things she teaches them. The other day he said "There was way too much chit chat at the green table, so Ms. D moved James over there to see if he could provide a little bit of leadership for that situation." I don't know if he even knows what that means! He knew that James wasn't in trouble, but I think that might be as far as he got it!



Anyway--I will get some soccer pics on here soon, but the camera is downstairs, and I'm just too tired to go get it and download photos. I guess I better do that before Friday, so I can try to remember to take pictures at the barn dance. We'll see!

Weirdness. . .just plain weirdness!

I seriously should not be alone with my thoughts. A few days ago I posted my strange self conversation. I have had even more weird thoughts like that lately.

Here's my most recent one. Why are things in the universe so backwards from what would be easy?

For example--why don't brownies taste like broccoli and broccoli taste like brownies? Part of the reason I used to weight 220 pounds is because I ate too many brownies and not enough broccoli. But, if they had tasted the OPPOSITE of what they do, I would probably be a size 2!!

Another example--running. You can tell (or I can anyway) a big difference in your run when you lose about 7 pounds. So, here's the problem. When you are WAY overweight, it is really hard to run. You are out of shape anyway, and you are carry all that extra weight. And, you are out of the habit and it is hard to get motivated. But, when you lose a lot of weight, it is easier to run. You are carrying less, and you are in better shape and you are in the habit of doing it. In shape people can probably carry the heavier weight better--but they don't have it. It would be easier to exercise for out of shape people if they didn't have so much to carry, so they would be a little more motivated!

Yet another example--kids. You would think that having two kids in school and only one at home would be less work for me, right? WRONG! That one needs full time attention because his playmate is gone! So, more work with less kids here.

Weirdness, I tell ya! Backwards and crazy weirdness!

OH!!! I wasn't going to blog about this, because I have been pretty whiny lately, but it actually fits as an example for this! So, here it is:

The saddest part of being lonely is when you don't have someone to talk to who understands it. Right now, I am lonely--even though I know lots of people here, and my husband is not deployed. But, none of them are really FRIENDS. Just acquaintences. So, I can't really talk to any of them about it. And, it doesn't really do much good to talk to S. about it, because he doesn't get it.

When I try to explain this issue to S. he would LIKE to be helpful, but he just looks at me with this blank stare and can think of absolutely NOTHING to say, because all that comes to his mind is "she is completely nuts and I have no idea what she is talking about" but he's been married to me long enough to know NOT to say that.

Anyway--if I had a friend who understood what I was saying and how I was feeling that was here and I could just talk about it, that would really help me feel better! But, since that is what I'm sad about, if they were here, I wouldn't be feeling it, and would have no reason to need to talk about it!

See--crazy!!!!

American Warrior

I have loved Kid Rock for a long time. I know it is out of character for me. . .but hey, I'm full of surprises (ha ha!) Anyway--I really wish he would put his music on Itunes, because there are a lot of his songs that I would like to run to! Check out this video: http://www.nationalguardwarrior.com/

I think you have to click "Play video" when you get to the main page. It is cool.

Response to Myself

I rarely forward emails with quotes and stuff like that. It has to REALLY make me laugh to forward it, and even then, I am selective about who I send what to. Anyway--I got this today, and in light of what I moaned and whined about in my earlier post, I had to put it here.

"One day a long, long time ago, there lived a woman who did NOT whine, nag, bitch, moan or complain.




But this was a LONG time ago--and it was just that one day."

I'm sure I should be insulted by this. But it just made me laugh SO HARD!!!!

Poor, Poor Pitiful Me

So--today I decided that I would do an experiment. I know that I talk too much all the time. I also know that it is because I am afraid that if I don't talk to other people, no one would ever talk to me. Today I thought I'd test that.

When I picked the kids up at school, I was the first one to arrive in the kindergarten/1st grade pick up area. I know a lot of people at the school, but I don't know if I actually have any "friends." I guess when I consider my definition of friend, I really don't. Maybe one. Anyway--since I was already standing by myself, I decided to wait and see if anyone approached ME as opposed to the other way around. Answer: No. Several people I knew walked up and promptly formed little circles that did not include me. As the kids were coming out of the building (about 20 minutes later) one woman (I'd say she's an aquaintence) actually came over to say hi. What she actually came over for was to relay a story.

Her neighbor (I don't know her name. Let's call her Jane) had just told her this story and she thought she'd share it with me because it was funny. I don't see the humor. Jane is quite small and always has been. Apparently some other random person (let's say Sally) had approached Jane and made all kinds of comments about how great she looked and how it had been so long since Sally had seen Jane and Jane had lost so much weight and looked so healthy etc. Apparently, Sally thought that Jane was me. Apparently, my friend found it humerous because Jane and I do not look at all alike. She is blond, very tan, very southern californian. I, obviously, am not.

Here's the thing. Did Sally think that "I" looked so different from recently or from a long time ago? If it was from 2 years ago, great. If it was from last school year--what the hell? Does that mean I am fat and unhealthy looking? (and apparently should bleach my hair blond.) I don't get it. And, I don't find it funny.

I feel very sorry for myself today, as you can see. I have always had the feeling that I didn't fit in. I can't remember a time or place in my entire life where I felt like I actually "melded" well with the rest of the people in the group/area. That's why I am always desperately trying to include myself, because I know that otherwise no one will include me.

I always envy people when they turn down an invitation. Like, if I call someone and invite them to go to lunch and they say they've already eaten or they have errands to run or their baby is asleep. First of all, my feelings are hurt, which is ridiculous. They aren't rejecting me personally, they have other commitments. But, the more important thing is, they are secure enough that they don't feel a need to seek whatever time they can find with another person.

I am not this way. If I had already eaten a full 7 course meal, and someone invited me to lunch--I would go. Because, I am desperate to have a connection to SOMEONE! Truly pathetic.

First Day of School

At home, before we left on the first day

Third Grader!! Kindergartener!!

Preschooler!!

Riding to school (so far, we've walked every day!!) N. doesn't wait for us. I didn't get a shot of him riding his bike. He probably wouldn't have let me if I'd have tried!
Going into the classrooms!

(My little kindergartener--R. going to class alone for the first time!!)

(J. is still not sure he wants to go to preschool!)

(I wasn't really invited to walk N. to class--I snuck this photo!)

With the new teachers!